MORE red flags to look out for when dating in the modern world!
It's so easy to be caught up in love. All your no's suddenly become absolutely's, and now you've lost yourself; infatuated with the person they've shown you to be. But is that really them? Or are you so deep in, that you STILL can't truly fathom the waving red. STILL colorblind, but deep down looking for more answers, reasons; signs that are once again... found....
Ambition
Someone who doesn't have their head screwed on; heading in the wrong direction of life, is not right for a relationship. If you think about all the things a healthy relationship requires: dedication, stability, mutual support...you can't expect these things from someone who's unable to meet their own basic needs. They may not necessarily have a 10 year plan, but think about the life they've built or are currently setting up for themselves...Why are they more concerned about finding a partner, than where their next meal is coming from? You can't build a life for yourselves on love alone, so push them in the right direction if you can, and support each other for the future you both deserve. If you've done everything you can and there's no sign of change, it may be time to leave and let them figure things out for themselves.
Nonchalant
There's nothing worse than a partner who dosen't care. For some reason, this attitude to life is so "in" right now, but I honestly don't know how some of you lot do it! You could be screaming from the rooftops about your issues, concerns; problems and they're just looking at you like you're insane, but in actuality...they're just emotionally unavailable. This can be extremely frustrating, and unless you're willing to stick around through their journey of emotional maturity, it's best to leave, as you're doing more damage to yourself, and will likely end up the same.
Where is this going?
Although it's important to live in the moment, being with someone that doesn't discuss the future of your relationship, is an indication that there probably isn't a future to discuss...I'm not saying they need to plan a whole wedding and pay dowry to let you know their intentions, but if there aren't even hints from their side that this is long term, it's likely you're wasting your time. You could be attempting to make plans for the next year; asking where they see things going and there's nothing but 'errr' 'hmmm'...take the hints and leave!
Me > ...
Someone who puts you first is extremely important. As harsh as it may sound, they shouldn't have to value you over their career and goals, because some things are just non negotiable, but if they have to choose between a night in with you and the 5th Goals session of the week...I'm sure you know what the decision should be. If you're feeling unprioritized, be understanding but communicate that. There should always be some effort to put you and your feelings first, especially in the most difficult situations. If it becomes ongoing, maybe consider that they're just uninterested?
Being the second rendition of the Red Flags series, it's just so crazy to think that this is someones everyday reality. There are soooooo many "signs" and red flags so i'm honestly not surprised if you can't spot them, the important thing is that once you do, you do what's best for you!
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